her state of mind in the story below...
Yesterday Klara got quite ill, she has a cold, and for the first time a relatively high fever of 39°C. The really bad part was her not being able to sleep very well, coughing all night and crying at times.
One of the times, around midnight, she got so upset and probably scared, that she cried and screamed from the top of her lungs, and we couldn't comfort her. That made me feel so small and helpless, as if in a void where in turn no one could help me with the most important thing in my life, that I myself started crying. There she is in my arms, me being her whole world at that moment, and I fail her. I was ready to sell my soul to the devil, just for her to feel safe and calm again.
That was no fuckin' picnic.
I hope tonight she'll feel better.
Update, 21:30
After throwing up just a tiny patch on the couch, the carpet and the floor, it's business as usual. She's screaming at us and talking, playing with the computer and laughing, so it just might be a good night after all.
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